service
How Not to Please a Dominant Woman #164
“I hope that you would allow me to serve you without having to pay for your time … for your own pleasure”
Nothing pleases Me about a cheap man, not in a romantic situation and certainly not when it’s a slave. I want slaves that are thoughtful, that send Me gifts. It doesn’t have to be something expensive, something small like a Starbucks gift card also pleases Me. I don’t want to have to micro-manage someone. That’s more work, that’s not making My life easier and more enjoyable. When out with a slave I never want to have to pay for anything. Depending on O/our dynamic, if it’s a friend that’s a slave vs My slave, I may offer, but ultimately I want to be taken care of. That is the type of service that pleases Me.
This recent experience exemplifies the perfect slave : while out with Sheri Darling in Manhattan, her slave knew that at some point We would need/want to eat. He didn’t wait until he was asked. He didn’t wait until one of Us posted about it. He sent Her money early in the day so We wouldn’t even need to think about it. He sent way more money than We would have normally spent on brunch. He wanted Us to go all out and eat somewhere fancy, and so We did. He gave Us an experience We probably wouldn’t have given Ourselves otherwise. The purpose of a slave in My eyes, is to elevate Your status as a Domme, to take care of You, not because You can’t take care of Yourself, but because You deserve these things. His pleasure comes from making You happy. A happy Mistress will want to give Her time freely because She doesn’t have stress, needs or wants that are being unfulfilled.
A slave who wants My time for free is only thinking of himself. That type of slave will undoubtedly feel that he is owed something which is not a positive dynamic because it’s not coming from a positive and pure place. For this slave to assume I need him to get play is egotistical and unrealistic. I don’t need a slave for anything. Need is not a healthy emotion, especially in a BDSM dynamic. I get plenty of play time in my Pro sessions. If I want something else I will seek it out. I’m not sitting at home hoping and waiting for some sub to decide to give Me playtime for free.
Mistress Julie Simone
Personal Slaves / Service vs Professional Play
I often get inquiries about being My personal slave. While having slaves can be very useful, for the most part these inquiries are coming from a very selfish place. I have 1 slave who serves Me. He is a service oriented cleaning slave. He doesn’t clean in exchange for beatings or sessions, he cleans because he gets his enjoyment from doing something that makes Me happy. THAT is his reward – My happiness. There’s no ulterior motive, he doesn’t do a half-ass job. When he leaves, My place is super deep – down clean.
One person asked to be My bondage slave. What exactly am I supposed to be getting out of that situation? I’m a world-renowned rigger, does he think I need practice? He suggested that I tie him then leave him in a room for a few hours. That’s what I call an energy vampire. Though we’re not in the same room, that person is still sucking My energy; I am still thinking about that person and need to make sure he is ok. Now doesn’t that sound more like I am serving him?
A young male called Me and kept going on and on about how good looking he was, how he could have any woman he wanted but he needed a real woman to take control. He couldn’t stop talking about how great he was. There is no “i” in slave. That is, there is no ego or selfishness in a slave. The slave is there to serve. Any extra attention, play, etc is a bonus, a reward, and should be appreciated as such. It is not something to be expected, thus no resentment on the part of the slave should ever arise. One needs to really examine his/her motives before offering himself/herself as a slave. If your motives are selfish, you need to book a session and pay for what you want. It really is that simple.
Julie Simone
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