Frequently Asked Questions (F.A.Q.)

Please review this section before booking a session and before sending Me an email. 

Asking Me a question that is on this list will result in your message going unanswered. 

Select the question to reveal the answer.  

I consider Myself a lifestyle Mistress because I truly enjoy being a Dominant. Getting paid is an added bonus. I don’t run an SM household as I feel that some separation is healthy and necessary for Me. I have two personal slaves in My stable but have room for one or two more. I am very into protocol which means capitalizing pronouns that refer to Me and calling Me “Mistress”. Yes it can be a pain to remember but nothing good in life comes easily. That level of discipline and wanting to please is what I desire; it’s what makes Me happy.

For Me to enjoy something the other person has to enjoy it as well, which includes getting enjoyment out of doing something that makes Me happy even if the activity isn’t a personal interest for the bottom. That said, My favorite activities are breath play with smoke, caning, single tail whipping, humiliation, face slapping, ball squeezing, nipple torture, forced dildo worship, anal play, and pushing limits. I have enjoyed doing play I wouldn’t normally list as a favorite when the other person was really into it. There are times when it’s more about the energy exchange then it is about specific activities.

The first step would be to send Me an email and politely introduce yourself. One needs to understand that the purpose of a slave is to make My life easier. I have no interest in micro-managing someone as that adds work; it doesn’t subtract work and alleviate stress. I will at times give potential slaves a task to test their seriousness and compatibility.  It could be something as simple as joining My OnlyFans just to see if they can follow instructions and are willing to spend a small amount of money towards their goal of becoming My slave. 

An example of a good/desirable slave :
I was in the city with another Mistress. Her slave knew at some point We would want/need to eat. When We woke up there was already brunch money sitting in Her account. The slave sent way more than We needed for brunch so We took the opportunity to eat someplace extra fancy and to treat Ourselves. This is the sort of thing I desire and that makes Me happy.

I want an intelligent and motivated slave, not someone to whom I have to give explicit instructions. If I have to spend more time telling you how to do something than it would take for Me to do it Myself, I really have no use for you. I don’t want to have to ask for something, I want it to be provided as needed or desired. A slave should eventually be able to anticipate My needs and wants such as coming home from a trip to a full fridge and a spotless house. Whining and having an ego are not an option. I don’t care how pretty you think you are, how lucky you think I would be to have you. If these thoughts even enter your brain, W/we are not compatible.

Buying something off My wishlist is a good way to introduce yourself.

My Amazon Wishlist

What you purchase says a lot about you, choose wisely. Regular gifts are expected and appreciated, often rewarded. A happy Mistress will want to play more.

Aside from the fact that I have strict cleaning and disinfection protocols, I do not trade cleaning / personal servitude for sessions. In My experience the cleaning is not as thorough when done by someone who is not service oriented and is only doing it to get what they want. While cleaning they are often distracted and fixated on the play that is to come.

Ideally one’s satisfaction would come from being useful, making My life easier and doing things to make Me happy. I believe that mutual respect is important in any dynamic and appreciate the things a slave does for Me. I do reward good slaves with play time, but it’s at My discretion and should never be something for which I am asked.  I am very generous with My time and like for My slaves to be happy. A slave that serves Me needs to be patient and respect My time. All parties should be very clear about their expectations going into such an arrangement and any changes or developments that come up should be discussed.

Step 1 : Book a paid session. 

I do not film very often and have several people waiting to film with Me. I require all potential video slaves book a session so I can see what O/our chemistry will be or to pay full session rate. Pain sluts are in high demand. While your interests will be considered, the content W/we shoot is dependent on what I need or want to shoot at the time. I may offer a discount occasionally, however filming with Me does not equal a free session for you.  

You will need to sign a release and bring 2 forms of ID with you; one must have a photo.

You can see photos and a description of My St Louis Dungeon here in the “My Dungeon” section.   Locations in other cities depend on your session needs and the locations available.  If you are seeking something specific this needs to be mentioned in your inital email to Me. 

I almost never sub. If I feel comfortable with you, I might let you tie Me up. When doing a switch session I am always tied first. I prefer not to be gagged. I do not allow blindfolds to be used on Me. I do enjoy a hand spanking. I cannot be marked. I do not allow implements to be used on Me.

I am occasionally topless,  but nudity should not be expected. 

I do not allow touching or groping. You must always speak to Me in an appropriate manner. Vulgar language is not appreciated. You may not release on Me or on anything belonging to Me such as high heels, boots, etc. Once you have entered My dungeon/play space you MUST refer to Me as “Mistress”. Failure to do so will lead to your session being terminated. No refunds. You will not be re-booked. Respect are protocol are incredibly important to Me. If you can’t respect My rules and limits you don’t deserve to be in My space or have My time.

I also have no interest in seeing bondage escape artists. If I see you trying to get out I will assume you no longer want to be tied and O/our session will be over. No refunds. I will not re-book you.

Email is the best way to reach Me : . Keep in mind I am extremely busy so sending Me emails with impatient tones such as “????” or “well?!!” are unacceptable and will prevent Me from booking you.

My ideal session length is 2 hours. I do offer extended sessions but prefer a shorter session first to get acquainted.

Booking Policies are outlined on the “Book a Session” page

The most common reason for turning down a session is O/our interests are not compatible. Since I am independent I am not required to see you. I only want to do sessions I will enjoy. If I’m having a good time, you are more likely to have a good time as well. This is not open to discussion, no means no.

Other reasons include speaking to Me in a manner I find offensive or disrespectful. I prefer to be called “Mistress”; you should never address Me as “honey” or “baby” or start off a conversation with “hey”. If you’ve previously no-showed for a session I will not re-book You. If you seem needy or continue to send Me emails talking about your fetishes or interests and haven’t sent a deposit, I won’t book you.

If you’ve come dirty for a strap on session more than once, I won’t re-book you. Shit happens, but it shouldn’t be happening in My dungeon. It’s disrespectful to expect Me to deal with an unclean body and hazardous wastes. If you’re unsure of how to clean out and prepare for a session, feel free to ask. This ties into the no same day appointments rule. If you’re calling Me at 5p from work on a whim, there’s no way you’re cleaned out and ready for a strap on session.

My limits are not negotiable. You will not convince Me. Offering Me more money when I’ve already said no will get you banned. It’s incredibly disrespectful. There are some things in life you cannot buy.

I do offer private lessons for couples, Dommes, and individuals. Rates vary, the range is $75-125/hr. Please e-mail to discuss.

I am open to the idea of meeting fans and being treated to dinners. However, My time is not free. You will be expected to pay for My meal, drinks, and time. Dinner dates/meetings are $125/hr. A 50% deposit is required.

Shopping trips require a minimum spending of $500 + an hourly rate of $100/hr with a 2 hr minimum. A 50% deposit is required.

I would need to do a shorter session with you before booking a vacation/event/getaway. For any trips airfare, hotel room and all My meals and expenses must be covered. A 50% deposit would be required. The rate would depend on the length of the trip and activities included but the average is $1,500/day.

If I am coming to see you and only you, you MUST pay for round trip airfare and hotel on top of your session fee. A deposit of 50% + expenses is required upfront.

It’s not necessary but it’s always appreciated. See above wishlist link for items with a wide range of prices. I enjoy dry red wine such as Malbec, Montepulciano D’Abruzzo, Cabernet, Nero D’Avola as well as Lindt and Godiva chocolates. Flowers are beautiful but not practical when I am traveling. I am allergic to strawberries and red roses. If purchasing something from My wishlist that is sent directly to Me, please remember to select the “it’s a gift” option and include a note so I know who to thank when I receive it. Sending Me a gift does not mean you get a discount or other perks. You should not expect anything other than a thank you. Regular gifts do help you stand out from other subs and put you to the front of the list re: booking.

Absolutely not. I do not allow ANY drugs in My sessions.

It’s not an interest of Mine at all. The only thing I will do with couples is rope bondage lessons. I prefer one on one energy. Any additional people added to the mix dilutes that energy for Me and makes it harder for Me to connect.

I am based in St Louis. I try to travel to New York, Washington DC and Los Angeles once a year. Places I’d like to go include Italy, Spain, Argentina, Chile, Peru…

Yes.  Cash meets require a $100 deposit and a minimum of an additional $150 upon meeting for the cash meet.  A cash meet is just that – W/we meet, you give Me cash, then you leave.  Depending on how many people are around I might have to do something humiliating for My amusement.